Self-Care Guide for Parents

To take good care of your child, you need to take care of yourself first. Take time for yourself without guilt.

The Airplane Oxygen Mask Principle
On airplanes, they tell you to put on your own oxygen mask before helping your child. Parenting is the same. You need to be healthy first to take care of your child well.

Why Is Self-Care Important?

  • Burnout prevention: For sustainable parenting
  • Emotional stability: When you have margin, you can be calm with your child
  • Health maintenance: You need energy to parent
  • Role modeling: Show your child the importance of self-care
  • Relationship maintenance: Keep connection with yourself and spouse

Self-Care by Time Available

5-Minute Self-Care

  • 5 deep breaths
  • A cup of your favorite drink
  • Look out the window
  • Stretch
  • Listen to 1 favorite song
  • Wash face and apply lotion

15-Minute Self-Care

  • Sip warm tea and zone out
  • Watch a favorite YouTube video
  • Text/call a friend
  • Simple yoga/stretching
  • Eat a favorite snack
  • Lie down briefly

30 Minutes to 1 Hour Self-Care

  • Long shower/bath
  • One Netflix episode
  • Short nap
  • Visit nearby cafe
  • Take a walk
  • Online shopping

2+ Hours Self-Care

  • Meet a friend
  • Go to the movies
  • Hair salon/nail salon
  • Hobby activities
  • Solo outing

Self-Care by Category

Physical Care

  • Sleep: Sleep when baby sleeps
  • Nutrition: Don't skip meals
  • Exercise: Light stretching, walks
  • Hydration: Drink enough water
  • Rest: Sit and rest for 5 minutes

Emotional Care

  • Express feelings: Journaling, talking
  • Hobbies: Do something you enjoy
  • Social connection: Don't isolate yourself
  • Laugh: Comedy, funny videos
  • Cry: Cry when you need to

Social Care

  • Stay connected: Keep in touch with friends, family
  • Groups: Join parent groups, communities
  • Go out: Outings without baby

Making Time for Self-Care

When Baby Sleeps

  • Prioritize yourself over housework
  • Use nap time
  • After baby's bedtime at night

Getting Help

  • Ask partner for time
  • Grandparent help
  • Babysitting services
  • Parent co-ops

Using In-Between Moments

  • Watch a show while nursing
  • Walk with baby in carrier
  • Have tea while baby plays nearby

Letting Go of Guilt

  • "Time for myself = selfish" is NOT true
  • You need to recharge to give more
  • There's no perfect mom/dad
  • "Good enough" parent is the best
  • Your child wants you to be happy too

Self-Care Ideas

With Baby

  • Play favorite music and dance together
  • Walk in the park
  • Sit at a cafe terrace with a drink
  • Go for a drive
  • Order your favorite food delivery

Solo Self-Care

  • Read a book or magazine quietly
  • Do absolutely nothing
  • Take a long shower
  • Eat something you love
  • Shop (online or in-store)

What You Can Do Today

  1. Drink a glass of water right now
  2. Open a window and take 3 deep breaths
  3. Think of 3 things you did well today
  4. Tell your partner "I'd like 30 minutes alone today"
  5. Plan 1 small thing you want to do tomorrow

A Message for You Today
You've worked so hard parenting today. You're already a wonderful parent for loving and caring for your child. Take even a moment for yourself. You matter too.

Sources: American Psychological Association (APA), Zero to Three, Child Mind Institute